If you are starting this post without having read “What is a Khuya?“, please take a moment and go back to read that first.
Why is this Khuya named “Victim”?
The Victim Khuya is named thusly due to its connection to a certain pain point within you. We have all experienced times where we were a victim (for better or worse) or we have made someone a victim. This stone is connected to a part of you that allows you to recall those moments, feel those feelings, and re-experience those experiences.
What does the Victim Khuya do?
Each Khuya does MANY things for me.
The Victim Khuya offers me a place where I can process and review my experiences with victimization, so that I may be aware of my actions, and both the short and long term effects of those actions to yourself and those around you. When I am connected to this place, I can think about my actions and decide if they were appropriate. It allows me to learn from these experiences so I can identify when I am speaking to someone else’s victim feelings and putting them in the place to experience that weight. It can help me to identify when someone else is acting in a way that speaks to my victim feeling and putting me in the place to experience that weight. And when you can identify a situation, you can control your response and reaction. It gives you the opportunity to take power in those situations.
Can I process my experiences with the victim energy like you can with your Khuya?
Not exactly like I can, but yes. Yes because you ALWAYS have the ability to look into yourself and process your emotions and experiences in a healthy way. You can always look into your past behavior and learn from it so that you may improve your future. You can always make the choice to be a better person. But the harder question is really, are you able to look into your past to experience the pain around victimization with the willingness to find some responsibility in yourself that you can take? As a side note: Please note that I never say “take responsibility” meaning “take the blame”. Blame puts people down and limits growth, responsibility is a way to view a situation, and find places that you actually have power, allows you to see that growth, and take advantage of it.
What does “spectrum of attributes” look like with the Victim Khuya?
There are really 3 directions that I know of. There is when you are being a victim, when you are making someone else a victim, and when you are witnessing someone else being made a victim. And each of these can be represented in 2 ways.
Wallowing in self-pity
When you allow yourself to be the immature victim, you fall into a place where you not only cannot see a way out of your hard place, but you can also find amazing and creative ways to limit your own ability to escape. This will then perpetuate your inability to break free. This is the perpetual spiral I had to battle with depression. The fight is very real.
Harbinger of change
The victim state is NOT a bad thing, it is a thing. Judgement can turn it any way you want. But here is where the victim in ourselves can be a powerful thing. Being in the victim state, allows you to protect yourself in the scariest storms, whole you build up the power to break free.
When reading the Misa, how does the Victim Khuya read in someone’s life?
The Victim Khuya is a single Khuya that is connected directly to two others. The Villain Khuya, and the Hero Khuya. It is part of a triad to help you look at the balance you hold between yourself, and anyone with whom you are in relationship.
Once again, there are many ways this can be read, and sometimes it is just a feeling that I get that really has almost NO connection to what I see. But I will list a few things I look for:
- When looking to read the Victim stone in my Misa, there are several things I look for. First thing is the triad of which it is a part. The Hero, the Villain, and the Victim.We immediately think “I want to be the hero between the three.” But the truth is, if you are too far toward ANY of the three in that triangle, you are out of balance. You should really aim to be centered in the triangle in each relationship as a starting point, and only change that as an intentional choice in the moment.
- Another aspect to review is where within the Misa it sits. Is it close to the Divine, the Intellect, the Soul, the Healer, Love, Unknown, or your Core? Different areas of the Misa can reflect different aspects of ourselves and our wants.
- I look for it in relation to other stones. With all the options, I can look at the way the energy is moving, or the direction of the Kintu (Prayer Leaves), or even other artifacts in the Misa to derive the correct meaning for that moment. For instance, if the victim stone is between Anger and Love.
- It could be that the anger is weak and it is overcome by love
- It could be that the anger is strong and creating a victim in the lover
- It could be that You are feeling like you cannot love because you are beaten down by your anger, and your victim is protecting you while you get ready to stand up and fight.
While the meaning may change in a single reading, each stone is essential to the Misa and the reading. There may be times when a specific stone is not really part of the relevant reading, but I cannot fathom the Misa without it.
How did I learn to read the Victim Khuya in my Misa?
This question is both simple, and completely too complicated. As mentioned in the post about what a Khuya is, these stones are part of me. They are also not part of me. There are aspects I use to learn that are very ‘study and learn’ like the meaning of placements, and the meaning of the Khuya, and the Kintu, but there are some piece that really seem to be part of the Khuya speaking to me. Being able to process things like, which is getting in the way of me bring my best self. Why does this come up whenever I review something that is unknown. It allows me to see change in progress. So, I put things down, and I know their meanings, and I trust the information that comes to me.